Surviving

Cahoots wrote concerning the Sucking Downward post--

"good advice i think, the only prob is some times getting another job is not a great option coz of responsibilities or bad market. And in case of people who don't deal with clients (like me) our firm really doesn't care how we dress...i am wondering if i shd still spend money on good clothes...usually i don't.'

Forget the clothes for the time being and concentrate on "getting another job is not a great option coz of responsibilities or bad market."

Cahoots is absolutely right and I don't want to appear flippant if suggesting the way around a problem is always to get a new job.  Getting a new job is the last resort.  The absolute last resort.  You should quit your present job only if you strart carrying a gun to work with plans to whack your boss.  Or something close. 

So if you have responibilities and expenses (who doesn't?) and you have to work, you have to learn how to survive.  So here is how I survived working nine years for one company, eleven for another and two each for the last two.

1)  Realize that work is work.  Work may someday be your passion or calling but if you are miserable right now, it is work, you are trading your time and talents for their money.  I worked for a subsidiary of Nestle and at a conference in Switzerland a top exec got up and said something like "We pay you for the work you produce.  We are not here to make you happy or self fulfilled.  If you are unhappy or unfulfilled, utilize your personal time to resolve these issues.  While at work, work."  Anybody that has sat through a Swiss business meeting knows thats how those guys talk.  No HR nonsense, no mission statements, just short and sweet.  And the guy was right.   

A company will not make you happy if you are unhappy.  So do your work and go home and pursue your passion.  If you want to write a book, write a page.  If you want to fix the house, fix a light fixture.  If you want to go back to school, check out night classes.  Get in shape, work out till you drop.  Or get a punching bag.

2) Responsibilites.  Contrary to what you read in the papers or watch on TV, I believe that most people love their spouses, partners, kids, parents, siblings.  But if you are supporting them, you have responsiblity.  And that can weigh you down.  At one point; with a mortgage, utilities, dental and medical bills and food bills that were killers, I started complaining and basically feeling put upon.  I had the weight of the family on my shoulders.  I basically just wanted to bitch a little but my wife, not one to put up with much self pity, said "ok, what is is you want to do?"  Didn't take long to get past the dream of being tight end for the Chicago Bears or winning a world series for the Cubs and then hit a stone wall.  I didn't know and I didn't have a plan.  Her point was come up with a plan or quit bitching.  Everybody has responibilities and that is good.  Just don't blame others.  Recognize you have them and if you feel you are overwhelmed and you convince yourself that you are doing all the work, come up with a plan to spread the work.  You might be surprised at the result.

3)  Evaluate your situation.  Figure out the following--Do I like my company?  Do I like my boss?  Do I hate my boss?  Do I like my co-workers?  Do my co-workers hate our common boss?  Is my boss a unique moron or is all senior management (defined as anybody above you) a bunch of morons?  Are there opportunities within the company but outside my department?  Is this a badly run company or an industry leader?  Would I be better off somewhere else or is the grass always greener?  This happened to me.  My first job lasted a long time and I became convinced I worked with some of the stupidest, most bureaucratic idiots on the planet.  Finally went to another company and the previous guys suddenly looked like brain surgeons.  Talk about panic.  Made the most of it and things slowly, very slowly, improved.

4)  Evaluate yourself.  Are you a good employee?  Do people like you?  More importantly, do people respect you?  Are you good at what you do?  If you can honestly say that you are giving your all to the job and you are a honest, ethical, bright worker getting screwed by the Man, then it is time to look for another job.  If not, try to be and see if anything happens in the workplace.  Give this enough time--6 months to a year-- and then reevaluate whether you are a honest, ethical, bright worker getting screwed by the Man.

5)  Always be looking for a new job.  Keep your resume up to date and make the effort to network.  I hate that word but to me it really means going to meetings in your field, meeting new people, keeping in contact.  I didn't do enough of it and wish I had.  One side benefit--It will keep your mind off the lousy job you have.